Motherfucking Jeopardy at The Gypsy Parlor Café and Bar

Hayburner on tap. Todd, the bar owner, turns up

the TV’s volume: It’s time

for Jeopardy. “Drink and play, Balls,”

he commands. All questions must be shouted

at the TV, as well as preceded

by the phrase, “What is motherfucking.”

Todd clears his throat, then demonstrates:

“What is motherfucking Donkey Punch?

What is motherfucking Enceladus?

What is motherfucking Hiram

Ulysses Grant?” A Daily Double. Tequila shots are on

the house, as long as the Jeopardy contestant bets all

of his or her money, and asks the right question. Not tonight.

Todd shakes his head. The people seated at the bar boo

and hiss. The bartenders laugh as they mix

and pour drinks. Another Hayburner for me.

“That guy has no guts, Balls,” Todd bellows. “Absolutely no

motherfucking testicles.”

~

Find Joey on Twitter or Instagram